Who is your everyone?

The other day, I went to a Bible study at a church that I'm considering attending. We began studying the passage from Mark 1 when Jesus is experiencing a wave of popularity as people watch him miraculously heal and cast out demons. One morning, Jesus takes time away from the crowds of followers to spend some time by himself in a "solitary place". Before long, Peter and the disciples search for him. When they find him, they encourage him to go back to the crowd. "Everyone is looking for you!", they exclaim.

During our discussion, I began to think about how uncomfortable I am with solitude. As we discussed various spiritual habits, I quickly identified taking time to be alone with God as an area of particular struggle for me.

As we began to apply the lesson to our own lives, the facilitator of the Bible study posed a question, "The disciples tell Jesus, 'Everyone is looking for you!' Who is your everyone?" I considered for a moment before realizing: I have been in San Diego for exactly two weeks. No one apart from my roommate even knows I'm here. No one is looking for me.

I like to be around people. Even when I'm doing solitary things like reading or studying, it is a comfort for me to have someone in my vicinity. If I were Jesus, instead of enjoying the temporary quiet, I would probably be tempted to rush headlong into the crowd and shout, "Here I am!" (Ok, maybe I wouldn't shout. But I might sidle up to Peter and James and say, "How about a game of Balderdash?")

God's timing is funny. When I was feeling discontent with my temporary phase of solitude, he reminded me of the importance of taking time away from "everyone" and everything to be near him. He reminded me that what I perceived as loneliness could be his gift.